clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
