we're blogging at a bar
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
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