It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
