i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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