Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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