Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 609 share tweet
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
