ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize