Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
ugly people sure do ruin things
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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