He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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