I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
