we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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