She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Randomize
