def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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