I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
