If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
