Yo dont text me then not text me
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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