why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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