If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
