Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
