looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Im just a social blackout drinker.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
