it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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