He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
