get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
