what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Randomize