ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
