in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
