Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Will exercising make me less horny?
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