Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
