There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
