Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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