You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize