how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You should frame my arrest warrant.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
