PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Barsexuality is the new black.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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