Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
