it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
