So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
