i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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