32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize