once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
