So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
