I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize