But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
