wat bout pragnant strippers??
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
high people should be assigned attendants
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
