What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
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