what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
