Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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