You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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