that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
