My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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