So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
His nipple licking is glorious
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